Tuesday, May 16, 2006

Publicity :: Newsflash

Hello. I am the Director. My name is Incognita Nom de Plume. I have been forced to take over my own media campaign from Administration, who turned out to be incompetent to a monkey. We had held endless meetings about it and we had all agreed with my idea that the best way to get the media interested in our new yet ancient venture is to concentrate on ME. And what happens? They start the campaign – no launch, no fanfare, NOTHING – in the Oubliette! The OUBLIETTE!!! Well, that was obvious insubordination. And then consider the patronising, not to mention dishonest, rubbish scrawled on it! And then to cap it all off, that nasty snide little caption. They hate me. They’re trying to demoralize and destabilize me. I suspect they’re Fifth Columnists. Maybe even Musrum’s Fellow Travellers.

And now I discover that all my pictures have rubbish written on them. Admin is insisting that it is no-one’s fault, the result of some breakdown in communication in the scramble of getting MoD up and happening. But they keep finding excuses to not turn up to a staff meeting. “Pressure of the exhibition schedule,” they whine. I suspect that there was no accident in the sponge-cats somehow getting loose yesterday. It was all too convenient.

So I’m going to take matters into my own hands and put them back in their box. I’m going to do the campaign the way that it should be run. And I’m going to wrest back control of the exhibition program. We’ll see who’s Director around this ruin.

Expect to see some changes around here.

Please contact me for interviews and news conferences.


Blogger Administration said...

On behalf of administration, let me just say how pleased we are to hand of the MoD promotional campaign to the Director. We're sure she'll do a much better job than we can.

If future, please do not contact the Administration Section for any publicity material or information about the museum.

1:36 am  

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